The Crap Counter: Not Just for Birds Anymore

Long time readers will know that I’ve got a small dilemma when it comes to birds: they seem to love the look of my head. More specifically, birds seem to love my head so much that they continue to crap all over it.  On my recent press trip to the Dominican Republic, we were spelunking through the caves of Los Haitises National Park and a bat took a crap on me. Only one bat flew above us, for only one small moment in time, and only one person got crapped on: me.

Cave in Los Haitises National Park, aka the scene of the guano.

Bats are not birds. They are flying mammals, and thus technically should not be included in The Official BirdCrap counter. So instead I’m asking my readers to help me figure out where the bat crap should go.

Teeming mass of baby bats.


1) Flying Things that Shat on My Person (suggested by Abbie Mood)

2) Mammals that Shat on Me (suggested by Melanie from Travels With Two)

2) Guano’d: The Bat Shit Counter (suggested by Rose from Creampuff Revolution)

3) Or, I can keep the bat in the birdcrap counter since it does fly and if you REALLY squint you could call it a bird.

What say you, Legal Nomads readers? Leave your vote in the comments. Additional suggestions will be added to the list.


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